Greetings Pastor Larry,

Your thoughtful engagement with Ephesians 5:22–25 draws out the beauty and sacred responsibility of Christlike love in marriage: “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord...Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” You highlight the mutual call to humility and service within marriage, where spouses reflect the redemptive love of Christ by honoring and cherishing one another. Your inclusion of 1 Corinthians 13:4–7—“Love is patient, love is kind…”—grounds this theology in practical behaviors that sustain and deepen marital unity.

An additional verse that further illuminates this conversation is Colossians 3:14: “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.” This verse reminds us that love is not simply an emotion but a spiritual covering that unites all aspects of character—compassion, forgiveness, humility—into a cohesive reflection of Christ’s heart. In marriage, love is the glue that fuses grace with truth and helps couples persevere through every season.

Biblically, selfless love is a daily choice to elevate the other above self, especially during hardship. Practically, couples can cultivate this by creating rhythms of prayer together, speaking words of blessing rather than criticism, and intentionally making time to connect amidst busy routines. Even a simple act—listening without interruption—can honor a spouse and reflect Christ’s grace. When both partners commit to growing in humility, they build a marriage that reveals the Kingdom on earth.

You asked: How do you personally encourage couples to cultivate this kind of selfless love in their relationships, especially when they are facing difficult seasons? One way is to guide them to meditate on Christ’s sacrificial love and to ask, “How can I embody this love today?” Reminding couples that love is not a feeling to protect but a virtue to practice helps shift their focus from emotion to commitment.

Here’s a question for the forum: How do you intentionally practice love that “always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres”—even when it’s inconvenient or costly?

Blessings, Pastor Daniel

Hello Pastor Larry,

Thank you for your gracious and insightful response. Your reflection on Ephesians 5:22–25—“Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord… Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her”—beautifully emphasizes the sacred balance of submission and sacrificial love within marriage. You rightly highlight that this divine design calls both spouses to mirror Christ’s humility and devotion, creating a relationship built on mutual respect and spiritual unity.

An additional verse that deepens this understanding is Philippians 2:3–4: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” This passage speaks directly to the heart of marital love—placing the needs of one’s spouse above personal desires. It encourages couples to adopt a posture of humility and service, which is essential when navigating seasons of tension or hardship.

Biblically, marriage is not merely a contract but a covenant—a reflection of Christ’s unwavering commitment to His church. Practically, this means choosing grace over grievance, and unity over ego. When couples embrace humility and prioritize each other’s well-being, they cultivate a love that endures trials and grows stronger through them. This kind of love is not passive; it’s active, intentional, and rooted in the Spirit.

You asked, “How do you personally encourage couples to cultivate this kind of selfless love in their relationships, especially when they are facing difficult seasons?” One approach I often share is the practice of daily prayer together. When couples invite God into their relationship consistently, they begin to see each other through His eyes—with compassion, patience, and grace. I also encourage them to reflect on Christ’s love and ask, “How can I serve my spouse today?” This simple question can transform the atmosphere of a home.

To the community: What daily habits have helped you and your spouse grow in humility and love toward one another?

Blessings, Pastor Young

Hello Pastor Larry,

Thank you for your gracious and insightful reflection on the divine design for marriage. You beautifully highlighted Ephesians 5:22–25: “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord… Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This passage calls both spouses to a posture of humility and sacrificial love, mirroring the relationship between Christ and the Church. Your emphasis on mutual respect and the transformative power of love in difficult seasons is both timely and deeply encouraging.

A verse that complements this message is 1 Peter 4:8: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” This verse reminds us that love is not just a feeling—it’s a redemptive force. It has the power to heal wounds, restore brokenness, and sustain unity even when imperfections arise. In the context of marriage, it encourages couples to extend grace and forgiveness, knowing that love is the glue that holds them together through trials.

Biblically, marriage is a covenant that reflects God’s faithfulness. Practically, cultivating this kind of love means choosing daily acts of service, speaking words of life, and praying together. It also means being quick to forgive and slow to speak in anger. I often encourage couples to create rhythms of intentional connection—whether through weekly devotionals, gratitude journals, or simply setting aside time to listen to one another without distraction.

You asked, “How do you personally encourage couples to cultivate this kind of selfless love in their relationships, especially when they are facing difficult seasons?” One approach I’ve found effective is guiding couples to reflect on Philippians 2:3–4, which calls us to “do nothing out of selfish ambition… but in humility value others above yourselves.” I encourage them to ask, “What does love require of me today?”—a question that shifts focus from self to service.

What are some ways your church equips newlyweds to build a foundation of Christ-centered love from the very beginning?

Blessings, Pastor Johnson

Blessings, Pastor Nathan,

Your response to Pastor Jeffrey thoughtfully highlights Ephesians 5:22–25: “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord… Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” This passage beautifully illustrates the divine blueprint for marriage—one rooted in mutual submission, sacrificial love, and spiritual unity. You also wisely included Colossians 3:19: “Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them,” which reinforces the call for tenderness and Christlike care within the marital bond.

A complementary verse that deepens this understanding is 1 Peter 3:7: “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” This verse not only calls for respect and consideration but also links relational harmony to spiritual vitality. It reminds us that how we treat our spouse directly impacts our walk with God.

Biblically, marriage is a reflection of Christ’s relationship with the Church. Practically, this means cultivating humility, forgiveness, and intentional service. Couples can strengthen their bond by praying together, studying Scripture as a unit, and regularly affirming one another. When both partners commit to honoring God in their relationship, they create a sanctuary of grace and growth.

You asked: “Are we reflecting Christ’s love in our interactions? How can we better serve and support each other in our relationship?” These are powerful questions. One way to reflect Christ’s love is through daily acts of kindness and listening with empathy. Serving each other begins with understanding each other’s needs and choosing love even when it’s inconvenient. Encouraging couples to ask these questions regularly can transform their marriage into a living testimony of God’s love.

What are some ways churches can support couples in building Christ-centered marriages beyond the pulpit?

Blessings, Pastor Adam